Wednesday, March 7, 2007

100 Greatest Red Sox >> #43 Pete Runnels

Pete Runnels, 1B/2B, #3 (1958-1962)

732 G, 825 H, 407 R, 29 HR, 249 RBI, .320 Avg. .407 OBP, .427 SLG, All-Star (1959-1960, 1962)

When Jose selected Pete Runnels as one of the old-timey players he would profile, Jose just assumed that he was related to professional wrestler Virgil Runnels III, a.k.a. Goldust, and his father Vigil Runnels Jr., a.k.a. the American Dream Dusty Rhodes. Pete Runnels is not. Nuts.

However, all is not lost, as it turns out that Pete, like his fellow Runnels’ has a secret identity. His shocking true identity is James Edward Runnels. So going by Pete is kind of pathetic. Jose hates people who hide behind fake names. They’re kind of sketchy.

But as it turns out Jose is glad that he ended up with Runnels. You know why? Because Baseball Reference lists, as his eighth most comparable player… get ready… Jose Offerman! Ergo, this profile is the eighth most like writing a capsule pinup of Jose Offerman. It has to be, it’s sabermetrics.

That said, there are still a lot of differences between Runnels and Offerman. For instance, Runnels was a three time All-Star in 1959, 1960 and 1962, whereas Offerman was an All-Star, well, never. Runnels won two batting titles, and barely lost a third to Ted Williams, whereas Offerman won none and narrowly lost a race with Dante Bichette for biggest jackass on the team. And with on base percentages ranging from .396 to .416 in his years with the Red Sox, Runnels could have done a far better job replacing Mo Vaughn’s “on base capability” than Offerman ever did.

Of course, Offerman does have his advantages too. Even though Jose has never seen tape of Runnels, he’s pretty sure he didn’t make that over the shoulder play running into the outfield as well as Offerman… come on, no one made that play as well as Offerman.

I’m Jose Melendez, and those are my KEYS TO THE 100 GREATEST RED SOX.

1 comment:

Meagan said...

This won't really have success, I feel like this.